I don’t wanna bang on the drum all day, I just wanna die

People who claim to care say things like “it will all feel better in the morning.” how is that? At night, I’ve had all day to forget about it and also two glasses of wine. In the morning, the reality of life comes crashing down on me. I think in school I heard that most suicides actually happen in the morning.

I’ve been looking for ways to make my life somehow better or at least momentarily more interesting. Like getting involved in the stock market (there’s money to be made, right?), or buying a bottle of absinthe (it’s legal here).