EXNX

driving me crazy. can’t sleep, thinking about it. I need...

Fri, 18 May 2012 10:13:46 -0400

driving me crazy. can’t sleep, thinking about it. I need some air. breathe it into me again. it doesn’t mean anything.

try again.

Fri, 18 May 2012 06:01:04 -0400

try again.

I feel safer with you.

Thu, 17 May 2012 23:01:45 -0400

I feel safer with you.

pretending that you still love me back.

Thu, 17 May 2012 10:41:31 -0400

pretending that you still love me back.

I’ve been thinking way too much.

Wed, 16 May 2012 18:30:15 -0400

I’ve been thinking way too much.

nostalgia has always had a place in my life. sometimes I think I...

Tue, 15 May 2012 08:41:00 -0400

nostalgia has always had a place in my life. sometimes I think I live in the present just so that one day I can look back and wish for it to return. I don’t really think this is a good thing. I’m not sure really.

Thai food.

Wed, 02 May 2012 12:24:37 -0400

Thai food.

had a dream that I can’t talk about.

Wed, 25 Apr 2012 16:10:24 -0400

had a dream that I can’t talk about.

had trouble getting out of bed this morning. the sobering...

Tue, 24 Apr 2012 12:24:29 -0400

had trouble getting out of bed this morning. the sobering reminder of what it means to be an adult. I won’t pretend that I’ve got everything figured out. I couldn’t fool you, anyway.

great expectations.

Sun, 22 Apr 2012 16:41:46 -0400

great expectations.

the harsh truth.

Fri, 20 Apr 2012 18:23:32 -0400

the harsh truth.

Photo

Wed, 18 Apr 2012 11:44:24 -0400

it’s a beautiful day, if you’re talking about the...

Wed, 18 Apr 2012 09:41:51 -0400

it’s a beautiful day, if you’re talking about the weather.

ben and I both fought off hangovers in the studio this morning....

Sat, 10 Mar 2012 14:30:38 -0500

ben and I both fought off hangovers in the studio this morning. i still feel fucking terrible. we recorded guitar though which is a big weight off my shoulders.

considered getting mcdonald’s on the way home. didn’t. regret it now.

working on easily the biggest and greatest project of my life at the moment. nothing to do with this morning, or eaux neaux at all.

also, saw itsagamble! last night. new stuff is a lot less melodic and more rhythmic. which is cool, but i fucking love the song he used to open the set with last summer.

Photo

Sat, 03 Mar 2012 08:31:00 -0500

it’s going to be an interesting month.

Thu, 01 Mar 2012 19:11:19 -0500

it’s going to be an interesting month.

thank you tumblr, for your new policy against self-harm blogs

Tue, 28 Feb 2012 17:02:46 -0500

i am a sucker for details, so i noticed the few tiny changes that were just made to tumblr’s dashboard page and decided to check out the tumblr staff blog to see if anything else was in store. i did not expect to be so pleasantly surprised and relieved to find a recent post from this week detailing tumblr’s plans to target self-harm blogs.

Our Content Policy has not, until now, prohibited blogs that actively promote self-harm. These typically take the form of blogs that glorify or promote anorexia, bulimia, and other eating disorders; self-mutilation; or suicide. These are messages and points of view that we strongly oppose, and don’t want to be hosting. The question for us has been whether it’s better to (a)prohibit them, as a statement against the very ideas of self-harm that they are advancing, or (b) permit them to stay up, accompanied by a public service warning that directs readers to helplines run by organizations like the National Eating Disorders Association.

having been a person myself who has had several first-hand experiences with self-harm, either doing it myself or being deeply involved in the lives of others who at the time were doing it, or just having been a teenage boy watching an oddly diverse-yet-narrow group of people go through their high school years, this means a lot to me.

self-harm is a very personal thing. there’s very little that one can do to stop another person from doing it. that has to be accepted, but promoting it or promoting that people embrace such destructive habits is not on. i do not think that people should not be allowed to express themselves, even with photography, it should be noted. i think that something like a place where self-harm scars are submitted, in order to raise awareness and inspire others to stop can be a very powerful and necessary thing. that is very different from, “look how cool my tumblr is, i post photos of my fresh cuts. reblog me plz.”

thinspiration is something that has become increasingly infuriating to me. perhaps it is partly due to my ignorance from never having an eating disorder myself or really even knowing anyone personally with one, but i find the whole thing so sad. as a bisexual male whose gender identity has always stood very close to the female camp for many years, i completely do not understand it. or if i do understand it, i do not – cannot accept it. but maybe that is the point. from a more healthy person’s point of view, it might make no sense whatsoever for me or one of my friends to cut themselves, even though to us, at that moment, it was completely the right thing to do. i suppose that is what makes it a disease. or at least a problem. a real problem, though.

i hate the idea of women, especially young girls, feeling pressured to look a certain way, especially when it is a body image that is unrealistic and fucking unhealthy and actually unattractive. regardless of how ignorant i may to be to the concept of having an eating disorder or being a victim of thinspiration, my heart of hearts tells me it is a completely devastating destructive force against females and i can’t ever be okay with it.

in addition to changing their policy, tumblr also plans to include PSA-style warnings whenever people search for certain tags. it was very relieving to see a few of them in the list…

In addition, we plan to start posting “public service announcement”-style language whenever users search for tags that typically go along with pro-self-harm blogs. For example, when a user searches for tags like “anorexia”, “anorexic”, “bulimia”, “bulimic”, “thinspiration”, “thinspo”, “proana”, “purge”, “purging”, etc., we would show PSA language like:

Eating disorders can cause serious health problems, and at their most severe can even be life-threatening. Please contact the [resource organization] at [helpline number] or [website].

all of these, to me, are very necessary steps and actions that i welcome. i am all for free speech, but i too have to draw the line somewhere. and i just can’t feel good about people being encouraged to hurt themselves like that.

just my two cents. self-harm is going to happen regardless, and to those involved i wish you the best of luck in overcoming your distress. not in the form of suicide, but in the form of rehabilitation through counseling and/or medication. i understand that even having gone through my own share of trouble and experiences, the traumas of others may very well be beyond anything i could ever imagine. still, i wish nothing but the best for those people to become well.

be safe!

quotes come from the original tumblr staff post, which you can read here.

that said, I think I am enjoying scotch more than even high-end...

Sun, 26 Feb 2012 10:40:30 -0500

that said, I think I am enjoying scotch more than even high-end beers as of late.

rob and I split the Mikkeller Big Worst Barley Wine last night....

Sun, 26 Feb 2012 10:34:35 -0500

rob and I split the Mikkeller Big Worst Barley Wine last night. it was like nothing I’ve ever tasted before. at 19.1% abv, definitely the strongest beer I’ve had. at $33 for 375ml, the most expensive as well. the taste was something else. one to remember, for sure.

jamie sent me the new xiu xiu record. my chest is the...

Fri, 24 Feb 2012 19:43:59 -0500

jamie sent me the new xiu xiu record. my chest is the middle-right photo on the top row of the included poster. since this is my favourite band ever and they have been such a huuuge inspiration in- and out-side of music…

this is so so so awesome to me.